9 Comments
User's avatar
Artemis's avatar

This was such a unique, unsettling concept. I really enjoyed the characters you built in such a short amount of time, and this made the ending all the more heartbreaking. Well done.

Expand full comment
Liz Zimmers's avatar

Beautiful, grim, and heartbreaking. One of my favorites, too.

Expand full comment
GrousyGirl's avatar

Thank you. Just what I was going for.

Expand full comment
Wendy Cockcroft's avatar

I do too. You've kept her sweet vulnerability in there—the ultimate source of the horror.

Expand full comment
Wendy Cockcroft's avatar

This is chilling in all the right places. That creepy spider-walk...! Great stuff!

Expand full comment
GrousyGirl's avatar

Yes, but ultimately, she's just a nice little girl... possessed by something... but still part child. I really like her.

Expand full comment
The Verdant Butterfly's avatar

Child possession always gives me the chills. This was really well done, I can totally understand the mother's desire but I'm reading going..."doooon't doooo it...." 😂 🦋

Expand full comment
GrousyGirl's avatar

Thank you. I love Lucy. She's creepy, but not evil. And I also love the mother, who still cares for this child-creature, and treats her like a child, not a monster. (I should mention that I teach first graders for a living and now I'm recalling stories I've written about monstrous children and wondering, hm... )

Expand full comment
The Verdant Butterfly's avatar

Yeah I didn't get evil vibes just the child possession part is unsettling. And you know the piece is great, look at all this conversation it's sparked. 🤣🦋

Expand full comment